Direction on talking to the public

Take this page in a very relaxed manner, so do not worry at all about having to remember all this stuff. all this stuff is actually quite simple. I have summarized the whole page into two points:
  1. Keep your peace, be at ease, and communicate with people whom are able to listen to you.
  2. There is no reason to communicate to those who do not listen or who are disrespectful and judging personalities, other than to educate them by your mannerism that generates naturally from your focus on your respect caring and compassion for them.

Have in mind, that for communication to occur, respect is necessary. Without respect, either side will not take the other person seriously. Thus, in your interactions with people, try to be as respectful as possible, and see if they are being respectful towards you. If they are not, you are under no obligation to talk to them. You have the option to educate them by example, by not speaking to them, by telling them exactly what they are doing wrong, guiding them gently, humoring them, and many other options.

In all your efforts to spread the news, tell nothing of yourself. Some will ask you of your own possible struggles. Do not respond. (You can speak about me, Sage Hope, and say that he was sexually strongly fixated, and he has completely overcome fixation.) The term addiction is best not to apply to anyone because it stigmatizes the person in society. I use the term addiction in the book because fixations occur from the low to high intensities. The higher intensities lead one to being addicted. However the addiction is because of a continual barrage of misinformation. Had the mis-information that we are exposed to remained static, meaning non-changing, it would have lost its appeal, and the fixation would cease to be potent, and no way would the person be addicted. Thus addiction is not the correct term to use. Here is a situation that has arisen in talks with people.  So a person approaches and says:

Person: What does addiction mean

You: Let’s leave addiction aside and say strong fixation. You can understand that a person can be fixated or strongly focused on sex from low to higher intensities. Naturally, addiction occurs within the higher intensities of sexual focus, and thus it interferes with the individual’s life in significant ways. (The ways of significant negative effects are mentioned in a list under the title Fixation Damages on the blog’s first page http://SageHope.WordPress.com

Person: but it says addiction on your sign, and on the book cover

You: I have already answered you (then you remain silent, or you can say did you hear my response? what did I say. can you repeat my response back to me so I can see if you really understood me?) if at any moment you feel uncomfortable for any reason, you are not obligated to continue talking. the reason is that people these days start arguments for the tiniest thing.

For example, once a person asked me: Where I was from? and I responded, it is irrelevant. This person’s response was, “You are letting down your culture, you are betraying your culture? You are Iranian right? Then he kept saying some more ridiculous things. Anyhow, best to keep silent, because you want to spread understanding, and respect. The way the troubled mind works is CHAOS. You battle it by SILENCE. You cannot discuss with CHAOS. You can try being very real in every statement. but what usually happens is that these people nit pick, and pick anything that remotely sounds wrong and decide to make fun of it, and state how wrong you are. LOL

So back to what we were talking about. Do not talk about yourself. When you get personal, numerous problems can arise. Your response to these questions is: ” this is not about me, it is about getting the solution to the suffering public” if they repeat the question in innumerable ways, you simply say, that “there is a need for it”, or “i have already answered you” any other discussion brought by them will be met by complete silence from you. There are some people who will ask you, and tell you all kinds of strange things, and because it has nothing to do with the topic directly, you will say nothing at all. There is no point for you to respond to questions that are clearly irrelevant. questions such as:

  • Where are you from? Do not respond (DNR)
  • What is it that you do? (DNR)
  • Do you masturbate? (DNR)
  • Are you a sex addict? (DNR)
  • Are you Married? (DNR)
  • Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? (DNR)
  • Have you had sex? (DNR)
  • Are you a virgin? (DNR) Oh yes you ar a virgin, that is why you don’t respond. (DNR)
  • DO you take drugs? (DNR)
  • Are  you a lesbian? (DNR)
  • Have you had a three-way? (DNR)
  • If they visually simulate any sexual gesture (DNR) (do not think of it as shameful, sex is wholesome, they just think of it incorrectly, so be non-judgmental toward them)
  • Usually you hear people laughing at your sign (DNR) (if you have one – their laughter is good because it signifies that it has impacted their mind, therefore they are able to remember it) A good sign is four lines of: SEX ADDICTION SOLUTION MANUAL. and the last line in smaller print http://SageHope.WordPress.com . you make the sign as big as you can. I have done mine using a computer onto a sheet of regular paper, and then laminated it. I have done two of them, so i stick the widths of the two sheets back to back together, and open them up from the center and stick them by a double-sided tape on a pole. the other side says SE_ ADDI_TION SOLUTION MANUAL http://SageHope.WordPress.com so that if need be you can switch the sign if small kids are present. Also you get some people who take offense to the sign, so you switch it, so the other side is showing, and they shut their mouths, because there is no mention of the word SEX which offends them. Even though it is the solution to sex addiction, their minds are so clouded, they just automatically think it’s about having sex, and they take offense, lol.
  • See how you feel when they speak to you. (DNR) if you pick up that you are uncomfortable, you are not obligated to speak to them
  • Notice if they speak fast (DNR) or you could ask them to speak slowly, and see if they follow through. By talking fast, you have recognized this person as possibly not being in charge of their mind, therefore they are liable to be chaotic illogical and biased in their talks with you. therefore be on guard, and more cautious with what you say to them. if they say they are fast talkers, and that is how they are, tell them, “that with practice they can slow themselves down, because fast talking does not allow for dep discussions, where subtle points are often overlooked, and deeper thoughts and observations are often missed. and also the talk often becomes illogical and biased, not balanced.”
  • Notice if they are charging their words with a loud voice, with a charge of a negative emotion behind each word or sentence. (DNR) This way you will know that this is not a person to talk to. You might decide to guide him by talking slowly, and mentioning that he is talking too fast, or talking too much, or not talking on point, or etc. but if you see them continuing to behave in a manner which does not allow for a dialogue, then you will simply stop trying to have a dialogue, because i dialogue is not possible. Once, I had a man of 60 years of age approach me with a negative somewhat harsh disposition posing a question to me, requiring me to respond. When I didn’t respond, and i was simply standing there (with not even a look of disgust which is very important) he immediately apologized and corrected his mannerism, laughing, and in a jovial way saying “excuse me for the way i talked”. Yes it was quite humorous when a person approaches with negativity when you are just standing there. it is strange, and funny. Thus when a person approaches and all he hears is the sound of his own voice doing very strange odd negative behavior it is quite obvious to him tha his behavior is RIDICULOUS. If you were to respond, what would happen is that his focus would be on your words, and he might like to fight against them with new words. Thus because his consciousness is on your words, he is not as strongly aware of his original ridiculous comment or mannerism. So, Invite you to allow them to hear how ridiculous they sound, so that they correct themselves.
  • What you are just going to stand there? (DNR)
  • I thought you had something to share (DNR)
  • if someone wants to shake your hand or any gesture, you are not obligated to follow with the same gesture. (DNR) However you can state that you respect them. if they have a negative reaction to you not shaking their hand it indicates that this person is not a person that you would want to talk to anyway.
  • No matter what others say, it does not define you. (DNR) keep your peace, and the more they spew garbage from their mouths the more they will seem mad, rather than you. if they want to make peace with you, allow them.
  • Part of getting the message across to people is about educating them on respect. You do so by respecting them, You are to be respected as well, thus you should have your boundaries as well. Meaning people are not allowed to touch you as they please, or get uncomfortably close. for example: since yu will be speaking to people, some people speak fast and so they spit. knowing this you want to kep a safe distance away from them so they do not spit into your mouth. thus if they get too close, you tell them respectfully to keep their distances. you can even explain why. if they do not respect that and continue to come forward, you can turn your face so you do not get spat on. just do not engage in talking with them. you have the option of extending on of your legs in front of you so they physically cannot get close.  I have had people that I have told them so respectfully, and they still continue to come forward, and I told them I will not talk to you, and I already told you why.

Keep in mind what they are trying to do is to affect you mentally somehow, by fixating your mind upon one or many of their statements, thus knowing their tactics, keep aloof, keep non-attached to any of their statements. you are there to be of tremendous help to people who will actually listen. You are there to be of help to people WHO CAN BE HELPED. you are not there for the people who close-minded and will stubbornly not listen and will not learn -Also have in mind that sometimes someone seems to be polite enough as they ask you where you are from, or some other irrelevant question, and when you respond, they turn ugly and try to affect you negatively

Thus you will see that you are there more than to teach about SEXUAL ADDICTION, you are there to teach the concept mentioned at https://sagehope.wordpress.com/2010/03/11/0-open-unbiased/. You are to teach on the first step, which is how to learn, how to discuss, how to think. You are pouring them nutritious knowledge, however before pouring them knowledge you are asking them to get a cup. They should be in a receiving mode otherwise they will not hear what you have to say. Thus do not waste your breath on people who do not listen, and who cause trouble.

Many have told me that I am in it for the money. Thus they will accuse you of the same. They will accuse you just as they have done to me of trying to attract partners for sexual interaction. Your answer to those whom you would like to respond to is that you are here because you care for people, and you are compassionate and helpful towards them, and you are in favor of them being in charge of themselves rather than being tricked and coerced into behaving more sexually than they would normally. You answer could be simply the truth which is you know this information to be very important for people to possess, therefore you are informing them of it. You must understand that , no one can say anything to you in any real sense, because you are not in it for yourself, it is simply a spreading of important information that you see value in. Some of the accusations towards you do not deserve a response. Do not allow what they say to overpower your mind. Meaning do not allow them to grab the attention of your mind to such a degree that it overwhelms your sense of reality. This is written in the book it is a form of mind control, that you want to be aware of and not let it influence you. For details of this you would have to read the book.

Most importantly, slow down. Notice your manner of talking. Does your speed of response to them and talking with them speed up in accordance to how fast they speak with you? If so you need to be aware and not alow that to happen. periodically notice how you speak and how you think. If you notice you are speaking fast slow down. slow down and think before you talk. Do not feel rushed in any way. Keep aloof from your emotions. This is just a communication of information. Some people take joy in messing with your emotions and messing with your thoughts. Some people live in misery and cannot handle anybody else living in a state of peace. Some people don’t like hypocrites. Some of these people have a tendency to start imagining that others are hypocrites, and without really knowing. They will accuse you of being a hypocrite, and a pretender. Do not allow yourself to respond to any of this. simply be yourself. clam and relaxed as best as you can remain in peace. There is no reason to respond to any of these accusations in any way. Just because they state their biased perspective does not make it true. If what they say is true in any degree, still it is none of their business. It is disrespectful for them to bring out in public for the purposes of shaming someone someone’s problematic features. If you have any problem, you are working on it by yourself, on your own time by your own chosen means. You are not to answer to them. It is actually shameful for them to be stating anything at all. it is showing how messed up they are in their minds. leave them, mentally, and be at peace. look on them with respect but as people who could use much improvement from their miserable lives.

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