Chapter 1 (part)

CHAPTER 1
Vast Array of Deception

INSIGHT 1

Lack of information on sex allows misinformation to become the foundation of our sexual understanding.

EXPLANATION:

Parents and others are shy on the subject of sex. They wish not to talk about sex. Explaining nothing or very little, leaves the children unprepared. The children do not understand sex. Since they have no information about sex, they can be easily swayed by misinformation, which is fed to them by various sources. This is crucial, because our first experience, or first information about sex, often becomes the foundation on which we build our understanding of sex on.
It is similar to how a grape vine wraps itself around other tree branches for support. The vine is our ever growing understanding, and the branch is the foundation which directs our understanding. However in the case of the misinformation that is presented to us, our vine of understanding is growing on a fallen branch and thereby it has the resemblance of stability, when in fact its foundation is faulty.
This first or early information coupled with sexual gratification, provides for the misinformation to take hold, very strongly. Since sexual gratification is undoubtedly, meaning experientially, felt by an individual, it needs no validation for proof of its existence. The strength of sexual gratification gives the resemblance of validation of the many perspectives that lead to sexual gratification. People are less likely to give up their original impressions and information, on any subject matter, including information on sex. After the establishment of the foundation, the understanding of human sexuality will develop around that original foundational framework, which limits and warps one’s perceptions, even when new information is brought forth. In this case, the faux foundation itself has to be identified, its validity has to be questioned, toppled, pulled out by the roots and thrown away.

INSIGHT 2

Natural curiosities about sex are often heightened by, hiding the anatomy and the information on sexes, exaggerating the differences between the sexes, and feeding the curiosity with doses of misinformation, in an endless variety of data addressed to the sight, sound, smell, touch, taste, thought and imagination of the person.

EXPLANATION:

We are naturally curious about many things, including our own and the opposite sex’s body. That is normal. However, some visual or auditory presentations of sex hook our attention, constantly playing touch and go with us, teasing us. This heightens our curiosity. It is an inaccurate statement to say that we have sexual attraction and sexual curiosity, TO SUCH AN INTENSE DEGREE from childhood. Rather, children’s curiosities are heightened by society. By showing a little and then not showing. By alluding to it, and by implying suggestions, the child at first does not understand, the child is puzzled by it. This adds more to the child’s curiosity on the nature of sex. This lures the child even more into trying to figure out what others are talking about.

EXAMPLE A: In Some Cartoons When a Pretty Lady Walks by In some Cartoons, when a pretty lady walks by (she has long or shapely legs, or a beautiful face, large lips, large breasts, dressed somewhat provocatively), the other characters start whistling, hooting, and bulging their eyes out. This simply adds to the curiosity of the child. The child finds it quite puzzling why the characters are behaving in this manner. Soon enough, the child’s mind adapts to their way of thinking, and might understand the wild behavior of the cartoon characters. The child is taught to react in a certain way, to look at females and males in a certain way. Some movies and cartoons show children by example how they ought to look at people. I am sure you can think of numerous other examples that are quite rampant in our society today. The girl is also introduced to a certain way of being. Have in mind, that these are shows for kids! We have not even talked about other material that kids are not supposed to be exposed to, but they are. End

Parents and society have beliefs on what men and women should look like.

Evidence 1: They try to make men and women look much more different than they really are. Men are still, more often encouraged to wear their hair short, “like a man”, they say. Women are encouraged to grow their hair long. End

Evidence 2: Men are discouraged from wearing colourful clothing. There is very little colour available in the men’s section in the various department stores. Women have a wider selection of bright colours. Try looking in the men’s section for bright orange, and you might get lucky with a bright orange shirt with a pumpkin on the front for Halloween. With considerable search within many department stores, I found ONE good bright orange and red mixed, for 30 dollars. As I am writing this, there are improvements being made in various department stores, as far as colour. End

Evidence 3: When you see the various restaurants, fancy dinners and other wide events, held in the western countries, men have to wear black suits. How dull can you get? Women are the ones who wear flashy, colourful clothing that is mesmerizing, and beautiful. End

Certainly men and women are different, but many societies exaggerate their differences. These exaggerations intrigue the mind. Public opinions heavily influence the mind of children. Children do not know and generally cannot figure out, on their own, what sex and gender are at such an early age. Sex and gender become an intriguing, puzzling, UNKNOWN. One should know about one’s own sexual organs and its functions as well as the other’s sexual organs and functions as well as the similarities and differences of these organs. Give them knowledge. If they are mystified by sex, then they can be manipulated by others who claim to know about sex.

©2009

From the book Open to Bliss by Omid Mankoo